Saturday, August 04, 2007

Life's like that

To all my friends who read my blog - a request. This is silly, but I spent around 2 hours writing this post, but at the end of it, I was not able to think of a good title and had to settle with the current one. Would appreciate if you would leave your suggestions for the title!



Sanu felt a sense of déjà vu. The last time he had gotten down from the plane and set his foot in Kerala was 14 years back. He was a disgruntled boy at that time, forcefully packed off to Kerala from Dubai, where was studying in the IPS till then. His parents had wanted Sanu to complete his high school in Kerala and had wanted him to get into a good engineering college. Sanu had spent a good part of his life in Dubai, had grown to love the lights of the city, the fast life, the luxuries and had not wanted to go back. But his parent’s stubbornness had persisted against his and he had landed one Saturday early morning in the Calicut international airport. That was 14 years back. 14 long years. He still remembered achuammavan (Achu uncle) had come to the airport to receive him.
Would achuammavan be there to receive him today also?
Sanu collected his baggage and walked out to the arrival gate and stood for a moment, his eyes momentarily blinded by the harsh rays of the summer afternoon sun.
“Sir, taxi veno” (“sir, do you need a taxi?”)
“venda” (“No”)
The words felt strange coming out of his mouth. He was speaking in Malayalam and Sanu felt goose bumps on his arms. He had not conversed in Malayalam with a person for a long time except for those English mixed mallu short phone calls which he made from the US to his parents once in 2 weeks.
He looked around as if expecting to see a familiar face. He had told his parents that he would be coming today, but had not told them which flight or what time he would be arriving.
“Unnikutta”. He heard the voice calling out to him. Nobody had called him unnikutta (his childhood pet name) for a long time. Sanu knew whom that voiced belonged to without even looking at the source of it.
Achuammavan made his way through the crowd and came running and embraced him.
“Unnikutta……how have you been? I have not seen you for, now how many, 9 years?” the old man had tears in his eyes.
“Achumman……” words failed him…

……in a distant past……………………………………………………………………………………..
“Unnikutta, don’t. You will fall off. That cycle is too tall for you”. Sanu had taken achuamman’s cycle and was pedaling it by balancing on one side of the cycle, with one leg on a side and the other leg on the other pedal, his feet passing through the space under the bar. He was not tall enough to sit properly on the cycle as adults would.
“Illya achuammava, just watch unni go at full speed now” (“No achu uncle, just watch unni go at full speed now”)
“Unnikutta, that is very dangerous. You will lose balance and fall and your mom will scold me then”. Sanu didn’t listen.
He was in the hospital that night with 6 stitches.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

“What are u thinking unnikutta?”
“Nothing achuammava, since when have you been waiting here?”
“Oh, I came at 4 in the morning”
“You have been waiting here for the last 14 hours?”
“Athinendha? Come, let’s go. Everybody will be waiting for you at home. Let me call them and tell them that you have landed” Achuammavan took a cell phone from his pocket and started to dial, eyes peering over his moon rimmed glasses. Sanu watched in amusement as the old man tediously dialed the number on his cell. Achuammavan had changed from the mundu-wearing, cycle riding simpleton. Looking around at the airport, he could see that god’s own country had changed too.
“Achuammava, I would like to have a cup of coffee before we leave, I didn’t eat anything on the flight”
“Ende unnikutta, you have not changed have you? Still don’t like to eat anything while flying, do you? Come lets go to the café coffee day”
“Achuammava, how do you know the shops inside the airport?”
“Oh, malathi oppol’s daughter regularly flies between Bangalore and Cochin and I come to pick her up and see her off. It is a regular monthly trip for me now!”

Achuammavan led the way and Sanu saw the distinctive red block of the café coffee day.
Memories flashed through his mind.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

“These guys are a rip off man. I say, lets buy a bottle of boost, some cold milk and make our own cold coffee”.
“Sid, you stingy fckr, how many times I have to tell you that drinking cold coffee is the last reason why we come here. Sid, look around you. Where do you find so many hot babes at one location at Bandra, in such a relaxed environment?”
“Sanu pal, you are the most frustrated Casanova I have known till now. Give up man; I don’t see much hope for you”
“Fck you Sid, if you don’t keep quiet, I swear I won’t pay your bill”
Sid was always broke. But then he was spending all his money on his multiple girlfriends. Sid had had a way with girls whereas Sanu always had to try real hard.
“It’s because of your name man. Who in the world would have a name like Sanu? It sound like a short form for sinusitis! And your pet name is even worse! Unnikuttan!! Ha ha….”
“Sid, don’t start that again. Do you want me to tell all your girl friends that your real name is Sethurama iyer?”
That would keep Sid silent for some time.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

Sid, the best friend he had ever had. Sid had been smart, handsome and popular.
Sid, his friend through high school and REC.
Sid, who had joined along with him on his first job at Mumbai.
Sid, his friend for 10 years.

He still remembered getting the call in NY, from Karan from Mumbai. “Sanu, our Sid…….”

Sid, with whom he had had countless beers at countless pubs in Mumbai.
Sid, with whom he had shared all his crushes and infatuations and the rejections!
Sid, with whom he had had his first go at grass.
Sid, with whom he had gone for countless double dates.
Sid, with whom he had argued about who was the best character in Atlas Shrugged.
Sid, with whom he had innumerable bike trips at 3 am in the night to fulfill their craving of sev puri.

He could not believe it first. How can it happen to Sid? Sid was so lively and he had spoken to him just 2 days back.
Sanu still remembered walking out of his 180 maiden lane office at 5 o clock in the evening after receiving the call, going to his apartment, locking up and crying. That was the first time in his grown up like Sanu had cried. He cried for hours. He had then taken a couple of sleeping pills and had gone to sleep.

He still remembered submitting the resignation the next week and catching a flight back to Mumbai.
His job in NY didn’t make any sense anymore to him and he didn’t know what he wanted to do in Mumbai. It was almost as if he was punishing himself for not being there at Mumbai when Sid took his last journey.
Later Sanu had come to know that it was a bike accident.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

“Sid, go slow, you are going too fast. This is a bloody crowded area man”
“Arre Sanu, you are always scared. What are you scared of? That you won’t find a girlfriend before you die?” That was Sid, he could crack a joke while going at 70 kmph on a busy Mumbai road.
……………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

“Unnikutta.. Unnikutta!! What are u thinking? Here have this, I got cold coffee for you” Achuammavan’s voice brought back Sanu from his thoughts.
“Achuammava, I am suddenly not feeling like having it anymore, you have it and then let’s go home”

A Honda city had replaced the cranky old ambassador, which had come to collect Sanu 14 years back, at the airport.
“Achuammava, I am tired, do you mind if I doze off in the car”
“Unnikutta, why do you have to even ask, you take rest, I will call you once we are about to reach home. Anyway, it will take at least 2 hours from here. But at least it is much better than landing at Calicut airport; it would have been a tiring journey back home then. 4.5 hours by car, my back would have killed me”
The car snaked out of the airport and got on to the highway and within minutes they were speeding along the road, with huge trees on both sides of the road, greenery around.
They passed an elephant, carrying a bunch of coconut palm leaves between its tusks.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………..
“Is it true that people keep elephants as pets in Kerala?”
That was Maya, her eyes widened with disbelief.
“Of course Maya. Mallus love elephants. We even feed them with chicken and toddy everyday!”
“Is it? Wow….” Maya’s normally round eyes became even rounder with incredulous innocent disbelief.
And then seeing Sanu doubling over with uncontrollable laughter..”You rascal, don’t try to fool me”
“But Maya, we do keep elephants as pets, although I doubt whether “pet” is really the word!”

“Is it true that Kerala has 3 international airports Sanu?”
That was Maya again with one of her I-don’t-believe-this-fact expression.
Sanu had laughed at this and asked her “Why are you so surprised at that?”
“But it’s such a small state”!! Sanu had yet again fallen into uncontrollable laughter seeing Maya’s face writ with disbelief at the fact that such a small state could have 3 international airports, out of the 14 totally across the country.
He had met Maya shortly after he had come back to Mumbai through one of their common friends. Maya was recovering from a relationship which had not worked out and Sanu was recovering from the shock of Sid’s death. They had gotten along together and Maya had in a way filled some of the void that Sid had left behind.
It had taken Sanu a long time to accept the fact that no one could become as close a friend to him as Sid had been, but it had been harder to believe that Maya had come close to being what Sid was to him.

They had hung out at the same places where Sanu and Sid used to hang out and Sanu was scared when he had found out, during the course of their friendship, that some of Maya’s tastes were same as Sid’s.

“You know what Sanu; I bet I could make a better coffee than this. Why do you want to spend money on this costly place?”
That was Maya, sitting at café coffee day and asking him innocently. Sanu had almost spilt the coffee on his shirt then.
“You know Sanu; I think Hank Rearden should have been the real hero in Atlas Shrugged, rather than John Galt”
That was Maya at her pick-up-a-fight-with-me-mood at its best. “Maya, sometimes I wonder how you can say the same things to me, in a different form of course, that Sid used to say. He used to love the character of HR and used to think that Galt was over glorified”
Maya had just smiled her angelic smile then.

Maya had come into his life by chance, but Sanu had realized that, unspoken they had both come to realize a fact, which neither of them wanted to speak out loud.
“Sanu, will you take me to Kerala once?”
“Of course I will. Why? Do you want to feed toddy to an elephant?”
“Sanuuuu!!!”


……………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

“Mayaaa”
“What happened unnikutta? Who is maya? You were calling out the name” Achuammavan from the front seat of the car.
“Oh…nothing Achuammava, I must have been dreaming. How much more to go?”
“Oh, about 45 more minutes”

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

“Sanu, will you tell me the truth if I ask you something?”
“Yes Maya…” Sanu replied without taking my eyes off from the meeting brief he was reading.
“Sanu, look at me. This is important”
“Maya, ask! I am listening, but I need to go through this report before heading back after lunch.”
“Sanu, they are looking for a guy to marry me off to”
This had caught Sanu’s attention and the meeting was forgotten.
“Maya….”
“Sanu, we have something between us, don’t we?”
“Maya…..” words had failed him then too. He had always known that he was in love with Maya and she also felt the same for him, but he had always dreaded talking about it. He could still feel the pain of losing Sid and he didn’t want to lose Maya too. He had fought hard to keep an emotional barrier between them so that this question never came up, even though he was aware of the fact that they were more than close friends now.
“Maya…do we have to talk about it now?”
Maya was crying now.
“Maya, you know how I am scared to become close to a person now, u know why I am not even going back to my parents now…….”
“Sanu, please shut up and listen to me. I love you and I know you love me too. I see a future for us and I want you to tell me whether you want to share it with me or not. I don’t have much time Sanu”
“also, what has happened has happened, but that doesn’t mean that you can ignore other people who love you”
She had run off without waiting for Sanu to reply.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

“Is it Sanu?” The voice at the other end of the phone asked.
“Yes, Sanu here. Who is this?”
“This is Maya’s father”
There was a silence for about 5 seconds from both sides and before Sanu could regain his voice..
“Sanu, I would like to meet you and talk to you.”
“Of course uncle, I could come over in the evening”
“No Sanu, I would prefer if we meet somewhere outside. Let us meet at the Army canteen at 5 in the evening”
“Ok Uncle, is anything wrong?”
There was a pause at the other end.
“We will speak in the evening Sanu”



“Sanu, I am going to get straight into the matter without beating around the bush. We have been looking for a groom for Maya and she has been pretty distressed about the whole thing”
He looked uncomfortable, but managed to continue.
“Son, we know that you both have been close friends for a long time and we are not stupid enough not to realize that probably Maya thinks of you more than as a friend. We have not questioned her on this and nor would want to question you know about this because we have brought up Maya giving her full freedom in what she wants to do in life and have full trust on her.”
“Sanu, you are a very good boy and I am sure you are probably the best friend that Maya has ever had. But, she is our only daughter and we have raised her for the last 25 years. We have certain hopes and ambitions for her and we would ideally like to see her settled with somebody who is a little bit older than her. You are her best friend and hence I want to request you to make her understand the reasons why we want her to do as we would like her to do”
Another pause.
“I know you are mature for your age and I know about Sid and how you have become a recluse after he was gone. The only thing that I want to tell you and you can take it if you want to, is that you should probably consider taking a break and go and stay with your parents for some time. After all you are also their only child”
“Son, I am sorry I had to ask this from you, but you will understand when you become a parent some day”


He didn’t have the guts to call her. He took out a piece of paper and started writing.

“Maya, over the last 2 years you have come to mean to me more than any other friend I have ever had (including Sid and you would understand what writing this would mean to me). We were happy together but looking at our happiness alone and not caring about the wishes and hopes of our parents, who took care of us till we were able to stand up to life on our own, is selfishness.
All I want to tell you is that you will be my best friend forever and I want you to make your parents happy.
I realize that I have not been a good son to my parents in that aspect and have not bothered to spend a single day with them in the last 14 years. I am going to Kerala Maya. And sorry, I would not be able to take you with me. But I want you to visit Kerala some time, maybe once you are married, on your honeymoon! I will make sure that I arrange for a bottle of toddy and an elephant!

~Sanu

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

3 months later.

“Unni, come and have lunch” His mom called out. Sanu was sitting in the reclining chair in the Verandah, pouring over the day’s crossword.
“Am coming, let me just finish off this crossword”
“Ee kuttide oru karyam. Oonu kazhinjattu pore ithokke” (“What’s with this boy? Can’t you do it after lunch?”)
Sanu smiled and went back to his crossword.
His mom started with a different thread in the background “Sreeja teacher was telling about this relative of hers and there is this girl in that family. She has done her commerce and is working at Cochin. Good girl, good family..”
“Amma, I have told you, I don’t want to get married now”
His mom looked cross and Sanu smiled when he saw the look on her face. He knew that his mom would pick on this thread in another 6 hours!
“If you don’t want us to search a girl for you, then tell us that at least you will find a girl for yourself. We have no problems with that”
“Amma, can’t I enjoy my life, like achuammavan”(Achuammavan had never married)
“Shush…if that is your idea in life, I wont let it work” his mom in mock anger.

The gate creaked open and Sanu saw Achuammavan coming in with a telegram in his hand.
“Achuammava, we were just speaking about you”
“What my boy?”
“Amma is looking for a girl to marry you off achuammava”
“Hush you rascal. At my age and marry? Anyways, had gone by the post office and the post master gave me this letter, it’s for you”
Sanu opened the letter and began to read.

“Son, you and Maya have won. She told me that you have left for Kerala to be with your parents for some time.
Will you take my Maya and keep her happy for life? We think that both of you would be happy together.

I am happy for you, on your decision to spend time with your parents.
We are reaching Kerala next week. With Maya. So make arrangements for toddy and an elephant!”

Sanu smiled, closed the letter, kept it in his pocket and called out to his mom.
“amma…..”
“Enthada….?” (“What is it, my boy?”)
“Well, I have found a daughter-in-law for you…………….”