My hometown Thrissur and Calicut (where I did my engineering) voted as two of the best towns to live in India (Note - Live, not earn!)
Courtesy Anoop's blog.
Tuesday, December 25, 2007
Of Xmas and more.
The Xmas trees placed around the campus does little to make the heart fill with joy. There were some moments which did manage to transport me back around 15 years back in time.
We have a Christian family as our neighbors and there are 2 sisters and a brother in the family, all of them, around 10 years elder to me.
Xmas season would find us (me and my sister) eagerly waiting for the chettan ("bhaiyya") from the neighboring house to let us know when they will start working on the xmas tree. We would be in high spirits even before this, right from when the "stars" start to appear in the houses. Multicolored, multi-shaped with designs and proclaiming the arrival of the holy day! We would rush to jump across the wall when we saw chettan bring the tree and the assortment of decorations to adorn it. This would take around 4 hours to do. That careful cello tape cutting, putting up of the ribbons without tearing them, winding them on the slender barks of the tree and finally putting cotton at suitable locations to give the appearance of snow. Then, next phase would be the symbolic shed for baby Jesus and all the visitors who came to see him. The small wooden box was being used year after year and is specially stored for this occasion every year. This would be covered with hay, cut to a perfect size and then a small reddish bulb would be put inside this "shed", which gives it a heavenly and cozy feel, just right for the son of god. Then chettan would get all those miniature forms, with baby jesus lying in a cot and the others placed around the glowing baby. Finally once the lighting is turned on the tree, it is indeed a wonderful sight to behold. How i wish i had taken a picture of that!!
The Christians around the area would go to the church at the night and this would be in a procession at the night. We would wait to see this from the balcony. There will be a jeep which would be trailing the procession and there would be a couple of singers sitting in the jeep and singing the prayer out loud. They would recite out stanzas from the bible and the procession would pause to kneel on the ground once in a while, before resuming towards the church. The church was just 5 minutes from my house and I have had the chance to visit it for more than once.
It was recently brought down and a new church was built in its place. Although more grandiose than the old one, somehow, in my mind, it just does not have that feeling of being a place of serenity, which its predecessor had.
Xmas time in Kerala is an amazing feeling, the weather just perfect with the December wind blowing and the night chilly. We had a custom where our Christian neighbors would prepare what we call as "vatteppam" (A variery of "appam" but sweeter and heavier) and would gift us this, along with a Christmas cake (this was reciprocated by us during the Hindu festival of Onam where homemade chips was given to them).
Xmas was fun then, harmonious, everybody celebrating. Now, has it become just another day of meaningless programs on the television?
As for me, this Xmas - the worst ever.
Mind is restless. Depressed might be too strong a word, but close enough.
Pizza, coke, chips and reading Asterix didn’t help and neither did aimlessly watching television, hence this post.
Campus is abuzz with placement preparations. Some of them really serious (into their 50th case preparation (or more)) and some of them just starting off and steaming up. And yet another few who have not even thought about it (but still manage to get shortlists!). I belong to the middle category (no consulting for me, that much I know), with just about starting to get psyched about the process. No, I am not worried about the interview process (got good feedback for the mock interviews). Then what?
Well, to get into the interview room, you have to get a shortlist ain’t it?!
On that incredibly optimistic (!) note, let me end this post and go to sleep early. Tomorrow is a new day and who knows what is in store for us?
P.S As an after thought, my mindless rambling about being tensed about the placement might not be really true and might be an anchoring bias!
We have a Christian family as our neighbors and there are 2 sisters and a brother in the family, all of them, around 10 years elder to me.
Xmas season would find us (me and my sister) eagerly waiting for the chettan ("bhaiyya") from the neighboring house to let us know when they will start working on the xmas tree. We would be in high spirits even before this, right from when the "stars" start to appear in the houses. Multicolored, multi-shaped with designs and proclaiming the arrival of the holy day! We would rush to jump across the wall when we saw chettan bring the tree and the assortment of decorations to adorn it. This would take around 4 hours to do. That careful cello tape cutting, putting up of the ribbons without tearing them, winding them on the slender barks of the tree and finally putting cotton at suitable locations to give the appearance of snow. Then, next phase would be the symbolic shed for baby Jesus and all the visitors who came to see him. The small wooden box was being used year after year and is specially stored for this occasion every year. This would be covered with hay, cut to a perfect size and then a small reddish bulb would be put inside this "shed", which gives it a heavenly and cozy feel, just right for the son of god. Then chettan would get all those miniature forms, with baby jesus lying in a cot and the others placed around the glowing baby. Finally once the lighting is turned on the tree, it is indeed a wonderful sight to behold. How i wish i had taken a picture of that!!
The Christians around the area would go to the church at the night and this would be in a procession at the night. We would wait to see this from the balcony. There will be a jeep which would be trailing the procession and there would be a couple of singers sitting in the jeep and singing the prayer out loud. They would recite out stanzas from the bible and the procession would pause to kneel on the ground once in a while, before resuming towards the church. The church was just 5 minutes from my house and I have had the chance to visit it for more than once.
It was recently brought down and a new church was built in its place. Although more grandiose than the old one, somehow, in my mind, it just does not have that feeling of being a place of serenity, which its predecessor had.
Xmas time in Kerala is an amazing feeling, the weather just perfect with the December wind blowing and the night chilly. We had a custom where our Christian neighbors would prepare what we call as "vatteppam" (A variery of "appam" but sweeter and heavier) and would gift us this, along with a Christmas cake (this was reciprocated by us during the Hindu festival of Onam where homemade chips was given to them).
Xmas was fun then, harmonious, everybody celebrating. Now, has it become just another day of meaningless programs on the television?
As for me, this Xmas - the worst ever.
Mind is restless. Depressed might be too strong a word, but close enough.
Pizza, coke, chips and reading Asterix didn’t help and neither did aimlessly watching television, hence this post.
Campus is abuzz with placement preparations. Some of them really serious (into their 50th case preparation (or more)) and some of them just starting off and steaming up. And yet another few who have not even thought about it (but still manage to get shortlists!). I belong to the middle category (no consulting for me, that much I know), with just about starting to get psyched about the process. No, I am not worried about the interview process (got good feedback for the mock interviews). Then what?
Well, to get into the interview room, you have to get a shortlist ain’t it?!
On that incredibly optimistic (!) note, let me end this post and go to sleep early. Tomorrow is a new day and who knows what is in store for us?
P.S As an after thought, my mindless rambling about being tensed about the placement might not be really true and might be an anchoring bias!
Thursday, December 06, 2007
Present
----- A few years back ------
“Come on, let us go to the EH. I need a smoke and have run out of it”
“No Sid, you had promised that you would start reducing and then stop. You have already smoked your quota of 5 today”
“Come onnn Ani. This stupid resume is not shaping up and I have not even started on my EOI. I have my stupid MVKS assignment to work on too. I NEED A SMOKE”. Are you coming or not?”
“You are impossible da. You are so badly addicted”
“Arre a man needs a smoke once in a while...what say?
--------------------------------------
“Hello, have I reached the residence of Mr. Sidharth?”
“Yes, Sidharth here”
“Hey Sid, Ani here. Long time”
“Ani? Ani from ISB? God. It HAS been long. What a pleasant surprise man? Where are you calling from?”
“I have been around Sid. Just another mortal with a normal existence….”
“Ok ok. Cut the crap. Tell me when we are meeting. Or why don’t you come over? I will tell Meera to cook a nice dinner and we can talk over some beer and reminisce about the good old ISB days”
“Yes Sid. That would be nice. I wanted to meet you anyways”.
---------The evening------------
“”Hi!!!”
“God Ani, you have changed a lot. I would not have recognized you if I didn’t know it was you”
“Are you going to invite me in or are we going to stand outside and speak?” Ani stood smiling with hands on his hips.
“Ha ha...come on in. You have not changed a bit. Ani and his sarcasm”.
“Wouldn’t quite agree with that Sid. Wouldn’t quite agree…”
-----Over the drinks-------
“Sid, your daughter is lovely. I feel happy for you. And Meera is just perfect for you”
“Thanks man. So what about your social life? Hame kuch bataoge ki nahi?”
Ani just laughed it off.
“Sid, do you smoke these days?”
“My god Ani. You are still on to it eh?”
“Tell me Sid, do you?”
“Ani, I smoke much more than what I used to at ISB. You know the grind right? Long hours, the stressful work…can’t help it da…”
“Sid. I am going to tell you something. You have to hear me out completely. Once I am done, I will ask you for a favor and I want you to do it for me and for yourself”
Ani kept quiet for 2 minutes.
“Ani….”
“Shhh….let me talk. Sid, I am dying. My doctor has given me max 6 months to live. But the fact is that time is running out for me and each and every moment that I have now is like the ticking of a clock. It is like being on a train that has lost control and you know that the gorge is only a small distance away”
Ani was quiet for some more time.
“My god Ani…..”
“No Sid. Let me speak. Do you know how I feel about dying? I feel at peace. I know that all of us have to die at some point or the other and it just so happened that he liked me so much that he wanted me to go back to him. I don’t feel afraid to die. But you know what pains the most? It is the though to getting separated from the people I love. The fact that I won’t get to see the face of the woman who would have been my wife if I had lived. The fact that I won’t get to hold my first baby I would have had if I had lived. The fact that I won’t get to see the first steps of my baby I would have had if I had lived. The fact that I won’t be able to play with my son I would have had if I had lived. The fact that I would need to leave my parents alone in this world. The fact that they will have to be torn apart to see their only son dying in front of them. It hurts Sid, it hurts. Not the thought of death, but the separation from my loved ones.”
“It also hurts to think that my only life as a human being needs to end before I got to do a lot of things in my life. That the sight of rain is a wonder which I will be able to behold for only a few more months, the sound of music is a feeling that I will be able to sense only for a few more months. The smell of coffee is a sensation I would be able to savor only for a few more months. The warmth of a hug from a friend I will be able to enjoy only for a few more months….”
“Do you know how important these remaining 6 months are to me? Do you know the value of this limited time I have Sid? Sid, I was so much in love with my life. So much in love……”
Ani’s voice trailed off…
“But I have no complaints. Sid, you have a wonderful family and touchwood, god has given you all that you wanted. The biggest gift that he has given you is health and you are hurting yourself by smoking it away. Do you understand the pain of separation from loved ones? You don’t need to go through it to feel it Sid. Just close your eyes and think for a minute. Would you want to see Meera and your daughter alone? Would you want to see them cry? I now know the value of life Sid. Each and every moment is valuable and is a gift. You are mocking the creator by smoking and throwing minutes of your life away. For me, yes, I didn’t smoke, but god had other plans. But you, why do you want to knowingly put your health at stake? Why do you want to tempt fate?”
“Sid, on the day I got to know about my illness, I thought of you. You were my best friend at ISB. I had decided that I will come and meet you. I just have one request from you. If not for my sake, for your sake and for the happiness of your family, give up smoking. Fate should never be tempted Sid. Do it for yourself. Give it up…………………”
Epilogue
Ani passed away 5 months from that date.
Sid gave up smoking from the day Ani visited him last and now actively works with an NGO to promote the message of anti-smoking.
“Come on, let us go to the EH. I need a smoke and have run out of it”
“No Sid, you had promised that you would start reducing and then stop. You have already smoked your quota of 5 today”
“Come onnn Ani. This stupid resume is not shaping up and I have not even started on my EOI. I have my stupid MVKS assignment to work on too. I NEED A SMOKE”. Are you coming or not?”
“You are impossible da. You are so badly addicted”
“Arre a man needs a smoke once in a while...what say?
--------------------------------------
“Hello, have I reached the residence of Mr. Sidharth?”
“Yes, Sidharth here”
“Hey Sid, Ani here. Long time”
“Ani? Ani from ISB? God. It HAS been long. What a pleasant surprise man? Where are you calling from?”
“I have been around Sid. Just another mortal with a normal existence….”
“Ok ok. Cut the crap. Tell me when we are meeting. Or why don’t you come over? I will tell Meera to cook a nice dinner and we can talk over some beer and reminisce about the good old ISB days”
“Yes Sid. That would be nice. I wanted to meet you anyways”.
---------The evening------------
“”Hi!!!”
“God Ani, you have changed a lot. I would not have recognized you if I didn’t know it was you”
“Are you going to invite me in or are we going to stand outside and speak?” Ani stood smiling with hands on his hips.
“Ha ha...come on in. You have not changed a bit. Ani and his sarcasm”.
“Wouldn’t quite agree with that Sid. Wouldn’t quite agree…”
-----Over the drinks-------
“Sid, your daughter is lovely. I feel happy for you. And Meera is just perfect for you”
“Thanks man. So what about your social life? Hame kuch bataoge ki nahi?”
Ani just laughed it off.
“Sid, do you smoke these days?”
“My god Ani. You are still on to it eh?”
“Tell me Sid, do you?”
“Ani, I smoke much more than what I used to at ISB. You know the grind right? Long hours, the stressful work…can’t help it da…”
“Sid. I am going to tell you something. You have to hear me out completely. Once I am done, I will ask you for a favor and I want you to do it for me and for yourself”
Ani kept quiet for 2 minutes.
“Ani….”
“Shhh….let me talk. Sid, I am dying. My doctor has given me max 6 months to live. But the fact is that time is running out for me and each and every moment that I have now is like the ticking of a clock. It is like being on a train that has lost control and you know that the gorge is only a small distance away”
Ani was quiet for some more time.
“My god Ani…..”
“No Sid. Let me speak. Do you know how I feel about dying? I feel at peace. I know that all of us have to die at some point or the other and it just so happened that he liked me so much that he wanted me to go back to him. I don’t feel afraid to die. But you know what pains the most? It is the though to getting separated from the people I love. The fact that I won’t get to see the face of the woman who would have been my wife if I had lived. The fact that I won’t get to hold my first baby I would have had if I had lived. The fact that I won’t get to see the first steps of my baby I would have had if I had lived. The fact that I won’t be able to play with my son I would have had if I had lived. The fact that I would need to leave my parents alone in this world. The fact that they will have to be torn apart to see their only son dying in front of them. It hurts Sid, it hurts. Not the thought of death, but the separation from my loved ones.”
“It also hurts to think that my only life as a human being needs to end before I got to do a lot of things in my life. That the sight of rain is a wonder which I will be able to behold for only a few more months, the sound of music is a feeling that I will be able to sense only for a few more months. The smell of coffee is a sensation I would be able to savor only for a few more months. The warmth of a hug from a friend I will be able to enjoy only for a few more months….”
“Do you know how important these remaining 6 months are to me? Do you know the value of this limited time I have Sid? Sid, I was so much in love with my life. So much in love……”
Ani’s voice trailed off…
“But I have no complaints. Sid, you have a wonderful family and touchwood, god has given you all that you wanted. The biggest gift that he has given you is health and you are hurting yourself by smoking it away. Do you understand the pain of separation from loved ones? You don’t need to go through it to feel it Sid. Just close your eyes and think for a minute. Would you want to see Meera and your daughter alone? Would you want to see them cry? I now know the value of life Sid. Each and every moment is valuable and is a gift. You are mocking the creator by smoking and throwing minutes of your life away. For me, yes, I didn’t smoke, but god had other plans. But you, why do you want to knowingly put your health at stake? Why do you want to tempt fate?”
“Sid, on the day I got to know about my illness, I thought of you. You were my best friend at ISB. I had decided that I will come and meet you. I just have one request from you. If not for my sake, for your sake and for the happiness of your family, give up smoking. Fate should never be tempted Sid. Do it for yourself. Give it up…………………”
Epilogue
Ani passed away 5 months from that date.
Sid gave up smoking from the day Ani visited him last and now actively works with an NGO to promote the message of anti-smoking.
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