A beautiful Smile & X-mas Cheer

The cheer was missing.
In spite of it being one of my favorite month (and week) of the year, in spite of having a 4 day weekend and in spite of finally getting back to my writing and blogging, the cheer was plainly missing. It did not help that my family was back in Kerala and the plane tickets were costing a bomb.Suddenly i was missing being back home at this time of the year.

On my way to office in the blue A/C bus (yeah..ok the 'purple' A/C bus!) yesterday, i tried hard to figure out my dipped enthusiasm. Yes, the happenings at office were..hmm to put it mildly, "unsettling"..and i didnt have a clue as to where my career was going in the next 6 months. There were things on which i was pinning my hopes on which were not working my way. The only relief was that i was now getting myself to write again..but not quite as much as i would have liked to and so even this was not able to bring a smile to my face.Watching 3 idiots with friends was fun, but somehow the smile was already gone by the time we came out of the theatre. On my way back home in the taxi, i suddenly had this scary thought "My god, why is nothing making me smile these days? Am i really becoming "Mr Grumpy"?

The roads were empty because of the holiday and this time the extravagant decorations were missing out from the malls, shops & the roads. The taxi came to a stop at a red signal. The window glass was down and i was listening to an ustad sultan khan song when there was a tap on the window. I looked out and saw first not the guys face, but the cover of a book which he was holding out to me"
"saab...dekhlo saab...accha book hai..ekdum bestsheller...". "The three states" the bright red pirated paperback proclaimed.
"yeah right" i thought. Already restless that i was, this unsolicited literary advice didnt go down well with me and i shooed the guy away.
I had just about sat back and closed my eyes, wanting to be soothed by the voices of the ustaad and KS Chitra when there was again a tap on my window.I opened my eyes irritated and angry for being again disturbed...and looked out. And saw her.

She was probably 6 years old. She was wearing a rag of a dress and was holding on to a bunch of threads from which rose a bunch of bright multicolored balloons.Her hair was matted and unkempt, the result of not being washed for probably days and she had a slight cleft lip. But what stuck me the most about her was her eyes. There were bright and round and i thought it was ironical that god had given her such a wretched life but inspite of it, her eyes were full of life. Or was this also a sleight of hand by that great magician?
"do gubbara lelo sahib...10 rupaya".
The signal had turned green and the taxi driver had shifted the gear and was about to move. I tapped him on the shoulder and asked him for a minute and looked back at her.
"ek tho lelo sahib...bhook lagi hai...vada pav khane ka".
I felt a tug at my heart and without thinking anymore , took out a 100 rupee note from my purse and gave it to her and asked her for 1 balloon. She handed over the end of a thread from which a single red big balloon was suspended and looked at me with confusion, holding the 100 rupee note in her hand. I then told her gently that she should go and get a decent meal with the money.

Before my moved away from the signal, i saw the girl's face break into a smile. A beautiful perfect smile. A smile that seemed to light up the entire surrounding, a smile so genuine which you get to see ever so rarely these days. Suddenly that odd realization which often strikes us but then is lost in our busy day today came to me..that here was a 6 year old who was happy and smiling at the thought of a full meal where we, inspite of having so much in life, sometimes lose perpsective and despair over materialistic things. How childish were my worries compared to hers?
The taxi was now speeding and i put my hand out of the window and released the balloon into the wind.....along with my worries and smiled.

The cheer was back.