Chatting with absolute strangers?

I have this feeling of pity for people who logon to chat networks and starts chatting with absolute strangers. What exactly do you get from it? I mean, there might be some common interests for a guy from some rural district of India and some stressed out babe in some Cosmo city of the US, but then how does it make sense to exchange pleasantries for some time, over a thing as vast and "virtual" as the net?(Excuse the really bad cliché).
If chatting is used to communicate with people you know, then it makes sense and is probably the cheapest way to keep in touch.
But hooking on to strangers and bantering?
Well, this sums it up!!



An employee was chatting on the web seriously with a lady called "Amy".
Manager walks into his cube and asks.
Manager : Can you write me a program for sorting the float values.
Employee(Steve) : I am kind of busy with another job. I will be able
to give you the complete program by tomorrow.
.......Back to chat......
Steve : Sorry for late reply!!! My stupid boss was here.
Amy : Bosses are really pain right ?
Steve : Yep!! They are pain in ...
Amy : Can you do me a favor darling.
Steve : I am for you honey.
Amy : Can you write me a program to sort float.
Steve : Oh honey!! It's on my finger tips....Here you go.
Amy : Dude!!! that is what I asked you at your cube

A change in the offering - this was during the triggering days

This was written some 8 months back, at a time when i was not yet initialized into the blog world..
So now its clear as to why i am making a move...



I really really dont know what i am doing here. Do i feel nice to work here?. "No", my inner voice answered. Do i feel happy about the work i am doing here?. Again the same two letter answer. Do i feel happy about my supervisors attitude here?. Again the same two letter answer.Strange. Just one year back, i was the most happiest working in this very same organisation and under the very same supervisor. Has things changed so much in one year?This makes me think that maybe, just maybe, its not really the organisation or the work or the supervisor that is the real problem. Maybe its MY outlook that is blurred. But, is it?I am not a egotistical moron to think that, if something is wrong, then its with those around me, and never with me. This self-introspective character, inculcated in me by my parents have held me in good stead in my life till now."If you are not happy with your current state of affairs, look around you and then look within you. Decide what needs to be changed and then act. Most probably, it will be your outlook which you will need to widen", my parents had taught me.No wonder, they say that wisdom comes mostly from experience.so let me put that into practise.What is that in my behavior, what prompts my supervisor to think that i crib a lot about my work?Two minutes, five minutes gone by. My creative and imaginary mind fails to come up with a reasoning. So does that mean that i am not in fact cribbing and just that my supervisor does not like me?Well, again NO!! Because often, we are not very good assessors of our own behavior. Right. So i go on about talking to my friends about my "crisis" (For lack of a better word). Surpise, surprise!!. This time i found out that my vision window did not need any widening. It was not narrow! So, i was not wrong in feeling "sick"!.Time to make a decision. "What's so difficult about this? Just change job!!". This, from my wife who has simple solutions to all complex problems.I wouldn't be honest with myself if i profess that, that particular thought has never crossed my mind. But, why was it that i was so reluctant to consider switching jobs, when all my friends were so comfortable with contributing to the attrition rate of their companies?Well, this question, i had asked myself several times and found the answer too. Its just that, this was the company, which had taken me fresh from college and made me the person i am today."So what? This is what happens to everybody. Why do you have to be so sentimental", asks my inner voice.(this one is the bad one. Yes, we have two inner voices, the good one and the bad one!.)Well, "why am i so sentimental?", this is one of the questions, which i plan to ask my maker, when i get to meet him. Or is it a her? Hmm, interesting thing to debate, but later!So, whats the next available solution? "Talk with your supervisor about your problems". That was my logical analytical software-engineer's mind speaking.Hey, but thats the problem. Whatever i speak with my supervisor, it is taken as cribbing. If i have any personal problems and speak it out,then i have "too many constraints". If i am not happy with the duration of my project (which i had every reason not to be happy), then i was "not flexible".All these, i agree, are problems which, every software engineer has to face at some point in their careers.So, i come to the conclusion that there are only two ways infront of me. These two ways,albeit difficlut for me to tread, i had, but no choice.First one was to follow my wife's method. I swear to myself that this will be my last option.The second one is so vey easy to say and so much difficult to put in practise. To do my work, without actually enjoying it, to do whatever is expected out of me, without putting even the least effort to find joy in what i am doing. Becasue, if i try to find joy in the work i am doing, then i will start hating myself.So, this is what i have to offer. Lets see how long i last here.

An article from sometime back

March 18th 2003
yesterday was my first train journey in 3 tier ac and it was certainly memorable in more than one ways...i had a motley of companions..first there was this foreign couple(?) students..who were playing chess and minding their own business.then there was this old man who initiated talking to me where as i was rather in a pensive mood..due to personal reasons..this old man introduced himself as Mr nair and on his way to meet his daughter settled in bangalore..he certainly didnt seem to be refined enough to be travelling in an a.c coach,a thought which later changed after he told me something,and my habit of always not trusting strangers made me wary of speaking out..still conversation came in pieces...he complained about the facilities or rather the lack of it being provided even after paying so much money for an a.c coach..he did get senior citizens rebate though..and well the ticket was send to him from his daughter...he generally used to come by a.c sleeper or by flight of 45 minutes..what?? flight from cochin to bangalore..ok....looks could be deceptive....
then came a cocky businessman and his two directors..but he could be justified in being cocky because his two 'directors' were probably younger than me..so he needed to flaunt his knowledge of anything ranging from the pros/cons of reliance versus restofem,to the cities of kerala,to the kerala political situation and an utter disregard for other peoples sensitiveness...his comments like "we give the foreigners undue importance...." " they manage with 2 pants and 2 underwears for 2 months" etc when he very well knew that the foreign couple could speak and understand english,did not go down well with the other people i can be sure of..
well the foreign couple were sure minding their own business...and i am sure someone somewhere will make sure that that cocky businessman eat his words...
but the journey presented me with a beautiful moment in the end..when we got down at bangalore that old mans daughter,son in law and grandchildren came running towards him and the grandchildren were hugging that old man and calling him muthacha..a scene of happy welcoming which u get to see so much in movies but so rarely in real world..hope that showing of love was for ever and not menat for a visitor who comes and stays for 2 weeks and then automatically becomes an unwanted hindrance in their homes...anyways that moment will always be etched in my mind..that smile on that old mans face...

A Second look

Second day into my blog life and looking through my page, i suddenly wonder why i had i written "Decent looking fellow" in my intro. Do we indians have a fixation with our looks? I have been through enough indian blogs to realize that there seems to be at least a slight indication of "looks" given by the blogger. Is is something that is unconsciously inherent in us? The desire to let the unseen world know that we are not bad looking? Strange. Have half a mind to go and edit it.

Happiness...(One of my wanderings into the philosophical realms)

What is happiness?
“Man, it’s such a simple question”, you say.
Oh yeah? Just try figuring out the answer. How much time you want? 5 minutes? 1 hour? 1 day? 1 year?
Let’s not go further. By this time, if you have really whirled and twirled the question in your head, you would have come to realize that happiness is something which cannot be pinpointed.
So, if i give you a million dollars, would you be happy. Probably or probably not. Why so? Well, the million dollars wouldn’t do too much good if u had a terminal illness will it?
Aha..i can hear you saying "that’s not fair".
"Assuming i have a healthy life AND if u give me a million dollars, i would be happy", you say.
Right, so u have a healthy life and a million dollars, BUT have some relationships that are "disturbing"(for lack of a better word). Probably you are one of those self-made people who were blessed (quite deservingly) with the knack of getting ahead in the world, but the maker was not quite generous when it came to the relations that he(or is it a she? good topic for a debate, lets do it later!!) gave you.
So will you be happy?
So, there is no such thing in life that once we get it, we will be happy.
I had a talk with a person once and he told me "When i stopped for a moment and looked back at my life, i realized that i was always postponing the happiness by saying that i will become happy once i have this. Later when i achieved it, i would yet again tell myself "I would be happy when i get this" and then again postpone it". So i decided that this was not taking me anywhere and decided to do something about this" (What he did regarding this is not relevant to the topic).
This was something which every one of us does without really being aware of it.
When i was doing my 10th standard, i thought i would be happy if i scored a good percentage. Later i thought i would be happy if i managed to get into one of the best engineering colleges in the country. Later, i thought i will be happy if i managed to get placed from my college in a good firm. Later, i thought i will be happy if i got married to my girlfriend. Later i thought i will be happy if i managed to move into my dream company.
The fact of the matter is that, all these above things did happen, but the question remains "Am i happy?"
I NOW realize that happiness is a state of mind. Its up to me to decide whether i want to be happy or not. If i choose to be a brooding person, whatever good things comes my way, i am not destined to be happy. But if i tend to look at the positive side of life and make up my mind to be happy RIGHT NOW, then, life becomes so uncomplicated and light.
Trust me. Its a choice really, whether to be happy or not.

I had a friend in my school,
Whom i thought to be the best.
We used to share secrets and
Were not concerned about the rest.

When i became a little older,
I came across a new group.
My old friend faded out,
An occassional mail or a call.

Friends come and friends go,
Some of them stay for a while.
Some of them stay forever and
Fills your life with sunshine.

Yours Truly

Havent we all felt this at least once in our life?

One of my favs!!

The Road Not Taken
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.